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I am a little man with a little plan,
Got me a dinosaur, hold him in my hand,
I keep a man o' war high upon my shelf,
Shot me a buffalo, ate it by myself.
I am a little man with a little plan,
Slept in the barbeque so I could get a tan,
Bought me a cockatoo to take me to the pole,
Climbed on a battleship so I could catch a mole.
I am a little man with a little plan,
I caught a mastodon, rode him to Japan,
Hunted a leprechaun to get his pot of gold,
Sneezed out an octopus because I had a cold.
I am a little man with a little plan,
Dug up a rental car buried in the sand,
Drove it to Zanzibar, sold it to the zoo,
Then wrote a symphony strictly for kazoo.
I am a little man with a little plan,
I mix my lemonade with the ceiling fan,
Bought me a hand grenade, threw it at a ghost,
Wrote my biography, then I made some toast.
I am a little man with a little plan,
I've got a cabbage patch growing in my van,
I keep a bandersnatch tied up in my yard,
He keeps the bumblebee from playing the guitar.
I am a little man with a little plan,
My favourite platypus listens to Chopin,
Borrowed my blunderbuss, went to rob a bank,
But they arrested him, stopped him with a tank.
I am a little man with a little plan,
I get my Ferris wheels from Afghanistan,
I keep a glockenspiel hidden in my bed,
In case a vegetable jumps upon my head.
I am a little man with a little plan,
I piled my garden shed full of raisin bran,
Then found a hammerhead, caught him by the tail,
Fed him a barber pole, pounded in a nail.
I am a little man with a little plan,
I ride a tuna fish all across the land,
Holding a China dish tight between my teeth,
Three chickens on the top and forty more beneath.
Copyright 2008 Allan Dowdeswell
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